When do you stop thinking about drinking?

I was recently asked the question “When do you stop thinking about alcohol?” 

Short answer: You don't. 

Longer answer: Through time and practice in sobriety you'll think of alcohol differently. 

All consuming, head space + a new lens

• All-consuming

When I first quit drinking thoughts of my choice were all-consuming. They included: “This is hard”, “Will it be like this forever?”, and “I'm doing something amazing and no one's noticing!” 

I wanted the people closest to me to understand what I was going through and want to talk about it as much as I needed to…and it was frustrating that they didn't.

Joining a community of like-minded people eased that frustration. I found a place filled with people having a similar experience to mine who needed to talk about it too. 

I let my desire to be alcohol-free consume me and dove into all things sobriety: meetings, quit lit, podcasts, online programs, somatic practices…you name it I was up for it. 

• Headspace

Eventually, the thoughts eased up. A new space opened up in my brain without me noticing.

One day after making dinner I noticed that the thought of pouring a glass of wine didn't enter my head. I no longer worried about if there was wine in the house, if I would drink too much, what people thought, stupid hangovers, ANY OF IT. 

Somehow I'd gotten to the next level. Not drinking felt normal. 

Now I make a point to remind myself where I am so I don't take it for granted. In this moment I have everything I wanted when I was drinking. 

• A new lens

When I think about alcohol now it's with a grounded belief that it's not for me. I loved it for a long time but it did me dirty in the end. 

Dr, Daniel Sumrock said, “Addiction shouldn't be called ‘addiction’ - it should be called 'ritualized compulsive comfort-seeking."

I sought comfort in a glass (bottle) of wine and it worked…until it didn't. I think of alcohol as an old friend who got me through some rough times, but who turned into a raging lunatic and stabbed me in the back. Good riddance.

The expectation to never think about alcohol is unrealistic. 

The US government collects billions in annual revenue from alcohol tax and our society is obsessed with it. It's everywhere.  AND, when you look for it, so is sobriety. 

When you become solid in your decision to live without it, alcohol can be thought of as that old troublesome friend you outgrew and replaced with better ones.